Dear Diary,
Pip the toy poodle reporting for duty! Today was simply magnificent, as all days are when you’re as fabulous as moi. Let me regale you with the tales of my adventures.
6:00 AM: Awoke from my beauty sleep. Not that I need it, of course, but one must maintain standards.
6:30 AM: Gently reminded my humans it was breakfast time by performing an intricate series of yips and spins. I call it my “morning sonata.” They seem to appreciate my artistic expression, judging by how quickly they leap out of bed.
7:00 AM: Breakfast served! I inspected each kibble thoroughly. Can’t be too careful these days.
8:00 AM: Grooming time! I sat patiently while my human brushed my glorious coat. It’s not easy being this glamorous, you know.
9:30 AM: The humans left for “work.” Honestly, where could be better to work than here with me?
10:00 AM: Patrolled the house for intruders. Barked ferociously at my own reflection. That handsome devil won’t catch me off guard!
11:00 AM: Nap time. Chose the sunniest spot on the couch for optimal lounging.
12:30 PM: Woke up to a strange sound outside. Turned out to be a leaf blower. I scared it away with my mighty barks. You’re welcome, neighborhood.
1:30 PM: Playtime! Demonstrated my superior intelligence by solving my puzzle toy in record time. Only took me 45 minutes today!
2:30 PM: The cat from next door dared to saunter through our yard. I showed him what’s what by yapping at him through the window. He seemed terribly impressed.
3:30 PM: Another nap. A poodle needs her beauty rest, after all.
4:30 PM: My human returned! I greeted her with my special “welcome home” dance. It’s a bit like the cha-cha, but with more tail.
5:00 PM: Went for a walk. Made sure to stop and sniff every blade of grass. One never knows when important messages have been left.
6:00 PM: Dinner time! I reminded my humans of my gourmet preferences by turning my nose up at my food for at least 30 seconds before deigning to eat it.
7:00 PM: Family TV time. I generously allowed my humans to share the couch with me. Even let them have a whole cushion to themselves.
8:30 PM: Bath time! I endured it with the dignity befitting a poodle of my stature. Only shook water all over the bathroom twice.
9:30 PM: Bedtime snuggles. I nestled into my silk pillow, surrounded by my favorite toys. A queen needs her entourage, after all.
11:00 PM: Midnight patrol of the house. All clear, except for that suspicious shadow that turned out to be a chair.
3:00 AM: Had a vivid dream about chasing squirrels. In reality, twitched my paw slightly and went right back to sleep.
5:30 AM: Another glorious day is about to begin! I must rest up for all the important pooch business ahead.
Until next time, diary. Remember: small in stature, large in attitude, and always impeccably groomed.
Yours in perpetual fabulousness, Pip the Poodle